My Academic Life Thus Far: Inattentiveness & Lack of Self Esteem

I have been in a state of constant lack of focus for most of my life. A few yeas ago, I was diagnosed with Adult Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder Inattentive-Type (ADHD-I).

 Translated into plain English, having ADHD-I means I have serious issues focusing and staying on task, I get bored at the drop of a dime, I procrastinate, I'm horrible at making final decisions, I am impulsive to the extreme, and I avoid activities that require me to pay a lot of attention.

When I was first diagnosed (2008) I felt as though a bright light switch had been turned on in a very dark room. The aforementioned issues have caused massive problems throughout my life, and gaining knowledge of an explanation was a marvelous thing.

 At the time I was diagnosed I was in college at the University of North Dakota. I was in undergraduate school working towards admission to law school. I never really wanted to be a lawyer, I had taken a couple of career aptitude tests that pointed me in that direction so I just decided to go with the flow.

 In my heart, I always wanted to study something within the professional health sciences field (medicine, epidemiology, public health, etc.), but I never believed I was smart enough -- let me give you some background on that: I dropped out of school in the ninth grade, not because I was pregnant or I needed to get a job and help out my family... I dropped out for the lame fact that I couldn't hack algebra... (I know, how pathetic is that?)

 I knew that chemistry and physics are math-based sciences,so I talked myself out of a biological science based career. I thought to myself "How in the world am I going to be able to pass a math based science class when I can barely master fractions?" So that was that. I was able to pass social science based classes with straight "A"s without having to do too much thinking (remember that lack of sustained attention aspect of ADHD-I?), so I just decided to go with the flow.

I chose law because it seemed challenging, and I figured I wouldn't get bored quite as easily as I would with just about everything else -- I was wrong. In the fall of 2008 I took the LSAT exam, and I performed well (158) with the help of Adderall (click here to read about Why I Initially Chose to Opt Out of ADHD Meds). I planned to apply to law school & begin in the fall of 2009.

While I was doing my pre-law routine, I obtained a paralegal diploma from an online school. My goal was to work full-time as a paralegal and pursue law school on a part time basis.  Did I mention that I was 41 years old at the time? Oh yeah, I decided to go to college when my kids were nearly finished with high school.  I had absolutely no desire, nor the luxury of time and youth, to go to law school without working

Fortunately, I spent a couple of months working as a paralegal in a law firm, and that was when I got an eyeful of what a lawyer actually does - man was it awful! I would have enjoyed law school much more than the job of being a lawyer, so I thought I might as well quit while I was ahead. I dropped out of school altogether and headed back to Florida (my home) to be closer to my family.

There I was... I had about 80 college credits, no degree, and no real passion for any career I thought I might be capable of enduring, so I kinda drifted for a while. Eventually, I moved to Arizona for work, and that was when I discovered naturopathic medicine began (read: How I Discovered Naturopathic Medicine).

Naturopathic medicine is the subject I have been most passionate about for as long as I have known me (roughly 43 years - give or take a couple of months).  Now that I have found my true passion, I have made the decision to return to college and pursue a degree as a naturopathic doctor (ND). However, there are several realistic issues I am going to have to deal with along the way:

1. I do not have a good track record of stick-to-it-iveness (have you been reading?)
2. The math thing is still an issue
3. The ADHD-I thing is still an issue (did you read Why I Initially Chose to Opt Out of ADHD Meds?)
4. I am 43 years old, and I'll be nearly 50 by the time I'm done

My solutions to the above issues are as follows:

1. I think I have finally found my true calling in naturopathic medicine. 
2. I am enrolled in a supportive math class & I am more receptive to learning because I am pumped to get into Naturopathic Medical school. 
3. I am exploring natural techniques to control my ADHD.  If the natural methods prove to be ineffective, I'm giving in, and I'll take the freaking Adderall and not worry about things that are beyond my control
4. I'm going to be 50 years old anyway, so why not be a happy and content 50 year old?

In the words of the immortal Betty Davis, "Fasten your seat-belts, it's going to be a bumpy night!"